Foul machines of Satan, I will master you!

Ugh these F-word computers! I want to rant about the horrible bends and tortures computers have been putting us through.

User i.d.s

Passwords

Security questiions

Hey, this is my F-word account. I am not a Russian (well genetically I am, but not hacker-wise) I just want to do a simple thing, why can’t you remember me from last time? And hey, if I don’t want to use a password, you should pretty much let me do it — again, it’s mine, not yours or the software’s account.

I reccomend using one password for everything, such as “fwordpass” and if that’s not hard enough for the bitch, add brief abbreviation or initialiatiion AND the numeral 1 (or your favorite numeral).

Example: Suckwad Savings becomes SS1

Okay, enough. I get this sickness of the soul even talking about technology. Bleech! Get a life, take a walk, talk to another human, and then make this stuff work for us, not the other way round. And please remember the range of people (stop calling us “users”!) that will be confronted with your stupid, clunky, who cares interface. The choices are multiplying and I will drop out of your mess and never come back at the first sign of IT neglect, bullshit, or other unfriendly-to-people glitch. You know I can. For every Uber there’s a Lyft. Hey, great title for my next rant!